In this rather fast paced world that we now find ourselves in, it often feels like everything is a giant race. A race to chase what everyone else is doing courtesy of that last picture on Instagram, or story on Facebook or Youtube because that is well you know, what you’re supposed to do “bro”. “Dude, do you even fish anymore? You never post fish pics on the gram like you used to bro?” Actually I am fishing, rather regularly I might add, but I’m spending more time living, and not being another episode of reality television.
So back to the living; there aren’t too many things that get me super excited out there much lately. You could say that whatever luster was left for me on my local and already pressured fishery has sorta been lost. Even more so this season because quite frankly the river has been beaten to a pulp this season like the jersey barriers on Interstate 91 by Colts curve in Hartford courtesy of Covid 19. But yet there is a silver lining in everything if you just let it happen.
Letting it happen is probably a better title for this post, cuz in all honesty that is exactly what transpired as a result of me really observing; maybe all those minutes, days, weeks, months and years spent on the water actually paid off. So a few of you might be chewing your nails right now in suspense wondering if I caught another behemoth like that fish of a lifetime from Chile a few years ago. Well, unfortunately that’s not where this is going, sorry to break your heart there. In hindsight that fish changed my life, it made me realize that even though I already knew this, life isn’t all about that next trophy fish picture for Instagram, life is in fact about so much more.
So I’ll reel you all back in here a bit, and cut to the chase on just what my observations did for me just the other day. Many of you know that I am a father of two daughters, two daughters whom I’d like to think are getting a nice sampling of what life has to offer. They both have a very wide and varied palette when it comes to food; my wife and I had them both trying everything when they were younger and it has stuck so far, heck they still try new foods to this day. You see, we weren’t gonna be short order cooks for these two with frozen TV dinners like many people around us, they were going to try it all and thankfully that turned out pretty good for us as they eat just about everything and have a love for good food, not processed preservative laden junk.
My girls diverse and broad appetites has translated into many facets of their short lives; what they have learned from trying everything at the dinner table has made them thirsty for adventure, eager to meet people from all walks of life and really pursuing and enjoying a very wide scope of interests, many of which involve physical activity and being outside. Granted they aren’t always out there, but they sure as heck are out there a lot more than the average kid of today by any stretch of the imagination.
What my observations told me with both of my girls was simple, you can’t force anything, you have to let them be kids and hopefully if you expose them to many of the things in life that you enjoy, well they too will at some point follow suit. Girls are a little different than boys, so sometimes it is often better to not push your interests on them. If some of you recall, when my girls were much smaller, they liked to tie flies with me in my shop. At some point the desire to do so faded away, although we still do that once in a great while. My girls learned how to fish with conventional spinning gear, just as I did when I was younger. They are both very proficient with that spinning gear I might add, and they love to fish, but they don’t fish every day and that is absolutely ok. Some of you out there need to read that last line, because it is truly the answer; they’re kids, and they need to be kids. The last thing I want to be is that parent who forces their interests on their own kids because they didn’t fully succeed at one of their hobbies or sports.
I see this regularly, and although there are families where this works and the child truly loves whatever they are doing and takes it to such extremes that they either turn it into a living or become a professional athlete, more often than not you get a child that ends up resenting that parent or flat out does exactly the opposite of whatever agenda it is your forcing down their throats. Life’s too short, and that time raising your children is much shorter as I watch my two daughters continue to grow almost daily.
So I took that leap of faith and decided to let things happen with hopes that maybe my girls would want to flyfish someday. The last few weeks my oldest really started on me that she wanted to go flyfishing, which at first I was a little surprised as I was actually starting to accept that she very well may not want to flyfish at all, and that is entirely alright. So yesterday we headed out, waders and all, and with her fly rod that she was given when she was much younger.
Patience has taught me that it’s better to teach people, and kids for that matter the right way rather than cut corners as it has the potential to create bad habits. Now I am not saying that fishing dry flies is the right way, what I am saying is fishing dry flies requires the angler to actually cast a fly line, and hinges around the basic principles of fly fishing in general. And, that was how I learned when I was a kid, so if it worked then it will work now.
So after putting on our waders we headed to a nice stretch of water, crossed the river and had ourselves some fun. The pressure from the current as we waded across the river was a first time experience for Tessa. With an ear to ear smile she giggled out loud as we marched hand in hand to our position across the river. Once we arrived she learned quickly that finding a nice level spot to stand and fish was paramount, and we assumed a perch adjacent to a rather nice piece of moderately paced water.
After stringing up her fly rod, which was another first, we opened up our fly box and decided on a fly for our outing. Sorry, no bobbers or tight line rigs were going to be her first experience on the water, dad interjected himself here, but rightfully so as my kid is going to learn how to cast. Life’s not easy, and we Strolis’ don’t learn the easy way, and I am proud to say she definitely held her own for her first time.
Granted, some might think that anything less than a fish in the net is a failure. There was a time in my High School and College years where I’d have felt the same, but with age comes wisdom. Although Tessa didn’t bring any fish to hand, many lessons were learned like the finer nuances of casting with obstructions behind her, problem solving drag which she figured out on her own, and also keeping the fly afloat. The latter was one of her favorites as the bottle of dry shake was a lot of fun, I didn’t realize how much fun drying off your fly can be, and I think I was smiling and realizing that often things are much more enjoyable through the eyes of a child.
Although I’d love to say that Tessa “hammered” fish the entire time, she had about a bakers dozen eat her lovely dry fly and she felt the pull of about four or five of them before they came unbuttoned. It’s safe to say we have some work to do on the playing and landing part, but that will come with time, and that first trout to net all by herself will be another first I cannot wait to experience. Truth be told, her first fly rod fish will be a great memory, but I think what she said to me on the river when she made a wonderful little reach cast, worked a nice drag free drift and hooked a rather large rainbow that came off a few seconds later was probably the best first. “It’s ok daddy, it’s definitely not about the fish, I’m having so much fun just being out here”.
Knowing that my twelve year old daughter clearly understands exactly what it’s all about, more so than many twice her age is better than any fish I have ever experienced. As we crossed the river and made our way back to the truck, took off our gear and climbed in, she turned to me and said, “That was so much fun dad, I love when we get to do stuff like this just you and me; I can’t wait to go again”. I guess you could say she’s wise beyond her tender age of twelve.